It is still the kind of thing that I have to remind myself of every time a friend does something that I don’t agree with or that simply bothers me. When I was younger, I took everything so personal. If a friend cancelled on me, I would get upset and take that as an indication of my worth, my insignificance. I still sometimes struggle with this, because while I want to be accepting of other peoples growth and independence, I also selfishly want them to celebrate my growth. But just because I have made some progress in those areas, doesn’t mean my friends have. So, I should let them grow on their own time and respect it.
Sometimes, this change means that you won’t talk to them as much as you used to or they may try new things as they explore what it is that really makes them happy. There are many reasons why friends stray and you may never know why and it probably has nothing to do with you. Don’t take everything so personal as we all have different developmental tasks to work through in our lives. Allow them to grow in their own way and not your way. Sometimes friends need to break away from old patterns to grow in a positive new direction. I certainly have had to let go of friends, but I have also had some friends who have let go of me. There are times when I feel sad about it, but then I remind myself that it’s not about me, it’s about them and their growth. So, I silently send them blessings and carry on.
Maybe one day, your paths will cross again and you will be in better places and able to start fresh or maybe you won’t cross paths again…and that is ok too. 🙂
At the end of the day, it really is about your relationship with yourself. Most of your challenges in life, can be conquered by correcting the relationship you have with yourself. xo